Joy in Trials

Well, I am sitting here on an express train on our way from Incheon (near the capital, Seoul), where we spent the day training for our school. It is said to be the fastest train in the world! So, I’ve got a little time to write. It’s times like this, where I look around at all of these people, visiting different cities & places, and realize WE LIVE IN KOREA. We’re not in Columbia anymore, Toto. This is our real, every day life. I think the reality of that has really begun to set in for me. (This is Hannah writing for now btw) I was re-reading some of my journal before coming; remember my thoughts about what Changwon was going to be like, what our school was going to be like, what LIFE was going to be like. I remember praying for all of these things, and now that we’re living it out, I can praise the One who cares about our deepest desires, big and small.  I can see God’s hand at work, guiding us to Changwon, and directly to POLY school. He’s answered so many of our prayers for a church, solid school, awesome co-workers, friends. It is because of that, that I can continue to call on Him in faith that He will give us what we need. And man, have I had to call on Him this week. It has been one of the toughest weeks for me at school. My morning kiddos are incredibly cute, but this week has been really difficult. I know now looking back that part of it has been my own inner struggles with perfectionism and feeling completely inadequate, but some of it comes from the fact that these precious little ones 1) don’t all speak English (a handful do) and I feel helpless at times to know how to communicate with them and 2) I wasn’t prepared to not be able to keep their attention for so long and felt like I had failed and 3) let's be honest...sometimes they aren't so precious : )  I’ve got some strong willed kiddos and it is difficult not being able to explain to them why I am disciplining them. Long story short, there were a few really stressful days where I broke down in the classroom, once when I bit my tongue harder than I ever had in my life (icing on the cake) and I just stared at these kids wondering what the heck I was doing here. One time this little girl who speaks a little English pointed, “Hannah Teacher crying!” Since it was so draining, all the life was sucked out of me for my afternoon classes with my older children. Just made for some long days and good cries after work.  I tried to explain to Traylor that I have always LOVED children, and have always dreamed of living overseas for longer than 2 weeks at a time as I had previously, and felt like I had failed…that maybe I wasn’t supposed to be teaching after all. I slowly I began to realize that—NO. I have not failed. This is not a mistake. This week has a purpose, and there will probably be more weeks—heck, there will be more weeks like this again. Despite all of that, God is faithful, His promises remain, and His joy can be found in the deepest, darkest moments.  I’ve been so comforted by truly trying to SEEK joy in the midst of trials. I rarely try to SEEK joy and CHOOSE to believe that God has our best interest at heart, especially in hard circumstances.  I always just want it to come naturally…I just want to wake up happy. But that doesn’t always happen. I have been eternally thankful for my sweet husband during this week. He has been my biggest encouragement, always checking on me after each class and lovingly correcting some of the lies I’ve allowed myself to sink into. He is the best, and I am growing more in love with the man I married.

Phew—sorry for the in depth story of my heart! I cherish your thoughts and prayers. THANK YOU! In other news, the week ended really well and I feel some of my joy being restored. My morning kiddos (the young ones) celebrated a bday celebration with the rest of the school and it was hilarious. All of the school came together as an assembly of sorts and we danced and played games. On the wall hung a ‘Happy Birthday Banner’ with Hello Kitty (Of course!). I posted a video to facebook so check it out.

Here are some of the cute kiddos in my class. Can you tell these two girls are the ring leaders of my classroom? The first is Sunny and the second is Christine: (hopefully you'll get a kick out of the peace sign, too!)

I only have two boys in the morning. One has a bowl cut. Yong is the first and Thomas is the second.

I have some hilarious older kids in the afternoon. They are older and much more advanced, so you can carry on conversations with them. I have this kid named Benjamin that brings pockets full of Lego toys that I have to take from him every single class. He is the biggest trouble maker, and literally turns into the Tasmanian devil, but he makes me laugh so hard.  Here he is:

Here are some other highlights:

We found a church! It is so awesome because there are people from all over the world, which we love. We went today for the second time and it was absolutely incredible. We are really excited to find a family here to plug into. Thank you for your prayers in this area--we've met some really great people and it is so encouraging to hear God's Word in another culture and know it is the same! 

We moved our bed upstairs to the loft and got a new (for us) couch that somebody was throwing out! For some reason, the loft has a really low ceiling. (Typical in Korea) You can’t stand all the way up, otherwise you’ll hit your head.  But it is perfect for our bed! Took a little video our us in our apartment: (please excuse the fact that I just got out of the shower!)

I love the every day life of finding quirky little Asian things. I love that we get to walk to school every day past the Hello Kitty Café (which was an AWESOME birthday celebration!)

I love using chopsticks. Today at our training in Seoul, they had forks for us—but I willingly chose chopsticks. Hannie the Asian.

I love that kimchi literally comes with every single meal. Also, sometimes our apartment smells like kimchi and we don’t even eat it there. It is like a permanent smell.

Again, I love that I can get an ab work out on my morning run and run past the old guys wearing neon track suits in the park.

I love the fish markets in the middle of the city, with fresh fish and fruits and veggies.  I don’t, however, like the silk worms boiling in a hug pot, ready for a tasty little snack. Gross.  BUT, the fried shrimp on a stick, and friend pancake-like-thing on the street has become a regular snack for us.

I’ve gotten used to the “bow” you do when greeting somebody. Why don’t we do that back home?! : )

I love the mountains just within our grasp.

And Asian bowl cuts. I love them so much.

And I love you guys. I really miss you guys. Come visit when you can ; )